February 2012
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How I see classical music sometimes.
France: [Finishes an elegant piece]
Germany: [Polite applause] Oh well /done/, France! Definitely in the tradition of Beethoven! Yes indeed, very much in His footsteps.
France: I should think so! After all, you may all /make/ composers, but it is to France that they come to gestate!
Italy: Pish posh. Italy is still the center of civilization. I challenge you to find a truly great composer who has not studied under an Italian master.
England: ...You know, Frederick Delius is credited as an English composer. Yup. He was /born/ here. His skin sucked the genius right out of our soil.
Norway: You know, Delius spent some time here in Norway. Maybe that's-
Germany: Why all his music sounds like the gentle glimmer of snow that clings to edges of a brook in spring? Please. Your music has no /pain/!
Norway: ...We're okay with that.
France: Psh, pain! You want pain! Come to France!
Italy: Oh yes, do go to France. Their music is so profound that it shall forever be remembered as cartoon backdrops, and the sort of operas that establishments put on during slow seasons to fill up the gallery.
France: We have /Debussy/!
Norway: Ooo, Debussy! We love Debussy!
Germany: Pah! Need I say more?
England: Poland, I'm amazed you're not joining this pissing contest.
Poland: [Looks up from newspaper] Hm? Oh. We've got Chopin. Whatever. Carry on with your little squabble.
Germany: This reminds me- I met this fabulous fella named Russia. I invited him to join our little tea party. Russia!
Russia: [Pokes head around doorframe] ...
Germany: Do come sit with us!
France: Oh my, yes, please do. Don't be intimidated.
Italy: Perhaps you can learn a thing or two from us.
Poland: Wow, seriously, you invited Russia? Thanks. Thanks a lot. [Storms out]
France: ...[Whispers to England] What's his problem?
England: Awkward ex. Also, don't lean so close to me.
Germany: Russia, we were just discussing how /pain/ adds a certain non-replicable profundity to music. What do you think?
Russia: ...[Pulls out violin]
France: Oh my, a performance! Splendid! I warn you, good fella, you can hardly follow my act, but we'll give you some pointers. [Has a sit]
RUSSIA: [ASSAULT OF PEERLESS MUSICAL GENIUS AND ANGST] [I SHALL SWALLOW YOUR SOUL WITH DARKNESS] [EVEN MY WALTZES SHALL MAKE YOU WEEP] [THE UNIVERSE IS COLD, EMPTY, AND EXISTENTIAL] [DIE, EMOTIONS, DIE!]
France: [Eyes bleed]
Germany: [Dead on the floor]
England: ... [Tea slowly spills in lap]
Italy: [Crawling toward exit, fingernails scraping at the floor]
Norway: ... [Hides behind Sweden]
Sweden: Sorry- What are we talking about?
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(If I wasn't so lazy, I would draw all this.)
Poland also had Szymanowski! Smugness EARNED.
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“What is music? How can one define it? Music is a calm moonlit night, a rustling...”
– Sergei Rachmaninoff
(via fuckyeahrachmaninov)
Yes, I admit it. I conduct the pop music on the...
the13thchair:
- The 13th Chair
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I'm pretty sure the french horn has all the parts...
the13thchair:
- The 13th Chair
Anonymous asked: Seriously?? It's Rachmaninoff! He's brilliant!
Anonymous asked: Do you have a link for Vocalise in Bb Major? Like a download? I have to play it for a challenge and want to practice along with the song first.
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At first I think it's gross when my instrument...
the13thchair:
-The 13th Chair
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I swear,
If I get blamed one more time for the other flute player forgetting an accidental,
People are going to get stabbed with my pencil.
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Oscar Sunday is Coming Up!
Really, the only category I care about is “Best Orginal Score”
So, the nominees are:
The Adventures of Tintin
John Williams
The Artist
Ludovic Bource
Hugo
Howard Shore
Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy
Alberto Iglesias
War Horse
John Williams
Who do you think will win? Who do you want to win? Personally I think John Williams should win all the awards. I really...
Anonymous asked: The music major thing you just said was wrong is actually right. It was saying stop complaining about your course load if you are not a music major. You're saying it's hard being a music major, so you're agreeing.
There is a piccolo solo in one of our jazz band...
Switching from tenor sax to piccolo in the same piece is WEIRD. And makes my embouchure very confused.
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New Reeds and the announcement that JK Rowling is...
Today is going to be a good day.